"How did you and/or your spouse handle taking time off from work during your adoption?"

SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCE

Renee, Washington - Adopted from China
I am a stay-at-home mom, but my husband took 2 weeks off for the trip, and then an additional week off when we returned to help with the transition of the baby to life in our home and daily activities. It was very nice to have him home everyday for that additional week, not only to help, but to bond with the baby in our home setting. It also helped him to have time for his body to adjust to the jet lag we experienced.

Gabrielle, Dublin, Ireland - Adopted from Russia: Here in Ireland you get 16 weeks paid adoptive leave (maternity is 18 weeks). If your company doesn't pay it the state will. Then you can take another 4 weeks unpaid leave after the 16 weeks and 12 weeks unpaid parental leave in the first 5 years of the child's life (both parents get this). There are other European countries that have even more generous adoption/maternity leave entitlements. I didn't go back to work after my leave. I'm so lucky to be a stay at home mum. A poor one but very happy. My husband got 5 days paid paternity leave from his company. That covered our trip to Russia and he took another week off after we came home.

Karla, New York - Adopted from China and Cambodia: Both times we adopted neither of the companies I worked for had an adoption leave policy. I tried having one instituted at my current job, A Major cosmetics company, but they would not budge. I took FMLA for 3 months with each adoption at no pay. It was hard, but I felt I and my children needed this time to bond.

Deb Kansas City - Adopted from Vietnam: I was very disappointed to learn that my school district had a maternity policy but that it did not include adoptions. I had saved up over a 100 sick days to use for maternity leave only to find that i could not use any of them. They consider maternity leave a medical condition and adoption is not. I felt that most of the maternity leave time was for bonding with the baby, even though my baby would be almost 8 months when I adopted her, I spoke to another teacher who adopted domestically and had picked up a 3 day old baby from the hospital and was then told my the district that she was expected to put a 3 day old baby into daycare or be docked everyday she took off.

I wrote letters and spoke to my supervisors and our union. Many were as surprised as I was that there was no adoptive leave policy. Not long after that our teaching contracts came up for renewal and they put in an adoptive leave policy. We get 3 weeks off with pay as long as we have sick days to cover it. Not as good as the 6 weeks of maternity leave, but better than nothing. I felt good that I helped get a policy changed that will help teachers who adopt in the future. Even with the 2 trips that Vietnam required, I was able to fit most of it into the 3 weeks time frame.

Faye, New Jersey: My company has a wonderful adoption assistance program that included paid leave for adoption and monetary assistance. It's one of many terrific employee benefits offered by the company.

John, Cincinnati - Adopting from China: I've been saving my vacation all year. My company doesn't have a leave policy, so I'm hoping to take off while we travel and stay home with our daughter for a week when we return. Our company is very family oriented so I think they'll be willing to do without me while we get settled with our little girl.

Susan, Ohio - Adopting from China: I've went back to school a couple of years ago and am just finishing up. I'm going to do some freelance work until the baby comes and then I'll stay home for a few months when she comes home. We're still talking about day-care details after that.

Lynn, Florida - Adopted from China: I work for a big company who offers 'maternity' leave. I took off for 6 weeks with pay and then took off for 6 more without. The family medical leave act says that you can take up to 12 weeks off. Even in the part where I didn't get paid I still had insurance through my company. I wish I could have taken off longer, but as a single mom I need to work to pay the rent. (especially after the adoption expenses.

Trudy, Wilmington - Adopted from Russia: We've been planning to adopt for years. We knew that it would be great for me to be able to stay home with our son, so we planned for it. We don't live in a big house or drive expensive cars, but I stay home everyday. I think it's important and has helped our son adjust to life here.